So I’m riding my new horse back from Armadillo to the ranch.  My new horse is a wild stallion that I roped and broke personally, I like him better than my old horse in two ways:

1. He’s faster.

2. He didn’t get turned into vulture chow by a cougar while I was 6 miles from the nearest town.

So, as I’m riding this great beast, I hear a woman calling out “help, help” from the bushes.  Sounds like a job for the “Kill ’em All Kid.”  So I ride up to see what’s up, and this pretty thing in a tattered dress runs up.  “Oh, please can you help me?”

She runs right up beside me, grabs my belt, and shoulder and pulls me right off my horse.  While I’m recovering, she hops on my new favorite stallion and starts riding away.

She got almost 75 yards away before she learned what we already know from the lynching incident; I am really good at shooting people on horseback in the back of the head.

POW!

My new horse wanders a little when no one’s riding him… Cougar Bait used to stand still.  Irritating, but a 100 yard range walk is way better than a 6 mile hike through the desert.